I'm Benedetta. I have been living with Simone for almost two years. He is a baker and has continued to work with the Coronavirus as well. I, on the other hand, am a kindergarten educator.
For the first time I stayed at home. Then came Phase Two. And even if the kindergartens remained closed, I made do. I started working as a babysitter again. In a way, I went back to basics. I started like this fifteen years ago. That's how I got hooked on children.
I've always wanted to do this job. I am now studying to be a kindergarten and primary teacher. Video lessons on Skype, mail. The way we interact has changed, but my goal remains the same.
Working with children fills my heart. Even if with the frenzy of these times we can no longer perceive certain things. Being with them is rediscovering the amazement for little things. We all need it. Especially in these moments.
I have been missing all of this in this period. I felt deprived of a part of me. I remember a similar period for me a year ago. My asylum contract was not renewed after three years. For me it was the loss of everything. I missed the routine, the work. And apathy began to creep in. The same perceptions I had when the quarantine began. But just taking advantage of that experience I decided to react and plan my days. And so I saved myself from the sense of bewilderment. But the fear remained.
Fear of having to go back to the initial phase above all, just that now I am starting to breathe again. And then I'm afraid that in a while my grandmother, if I continue not to see her, will not remember me, because she is ill with Alzheimer's.
Instead I am not afraid of the dark, nor of facing it. This darkness, inside and out, which has prevented us from seeing and understanding each other in recent months. I know that I have the right energies in me to deal with it.
Nor am I afraid to give myself and to give love, and to do it as soon as possible. Because if there is one thing that has become very clear to us these days it is that we are not eternal. Let's not keep the good inside waiting to use it who knows when. The time is now. Our time.
So I wish me and all my friends and family to be grateful for what we have. To find what we are looking for. To feel love and compassion for everyone, starting with ourselves.
